Vampire Academy: One Shot Collection
by Samwysesr
Summary: A collection of one shots based on prompts/requests I receive. Main characters and point of view will vary.
1. Hard Questions

I stared at the screen on my laptop, wondering how to respond to the email I'd just read. It was from Jill, and it was completely different from the straight the point, businesslike correspondences she usually sent me. The days when she had looked up to me were long gone, probably erased forever because of her bond with Adrian. His feelings bled through, affecting her, and now… well, she didn't think too highly of me anymore, to say the least.

In all honesty, I think the only reason she bothered emailing me at all was because Lissa demanded she keep me updated about how things were going in Palm Springs. Jill dutifully followed her sisters orders, but it was obvious that she wasn't happy with the arrangement. That was what made this last message so damn… strange.

I read back over it, knowing that I was stalling, but I just couldn't bring myself to answer her questions just yet. I understood what had sparked them—Sydney and Eddie had both submitted a detailed report of the incident with Lee Donahue. Both reports had mentioned that a relationship of sorts had formed between the two, so I knew that Jill was suffering and had to be feeling confused.

_Rose,_

_I need to ask you a couple of things, and I'm sorry because I know they are really hard questions to answer. I just… I really need some answers, and I think you're probably the only person who can help me. Also… I want to try and understand why you… did the things you did. Why you hurt Adrian. He's still suffering so much, Rose. Whenever he thinks of you, I get hit with it, and it's killing me. So much anger, and hurt and betrayal… and worse yet, there's still love in there too, so it just makes everything that much more confusing. Please, please, please answer me honestly, because I really need to know these things, and it's taken me a long time to get up the courage to even send this email._

_How did you feel when you lost Dimitri in the Battle of Saint Vlad's? How long did it take for the hurting to stop? Did it help when you dated someone else, and if so, how long until the hurt went away? Why weren't you just honest with Adrian? Did you ever love him at all? How did you feel when you got back with Dimitri? Did you even think about how it would hurt Adrian?_

_Thanks ,_

_JM_

She wasn't kidding—the questions were hard… more than that, they were emotional land mines just waiting to detonate. Answering most of them was going to leave me a shaking, drained, tearstained wreck. They required me to face memories that I'd been trying desperately to forget.

Not to mention, how much truth could she handle? I knew from experience that fifteen year olds are a lot stronger than most people give them credit for—hell, at fifteen I'd broken Lissa out of school and we were living on our own. But Jill wasn't me. Up until recently, she'd had a relatively normal life. Within an extremely short period of time she'd discovered she had a sister—who was now the queen—and had become bonded to a twenty one year old spirit using addict who was constantly on the verge of drifting into lala land. She'd already admitted in her email that the onslaught of emotions were slowly eating away at her. She'd just found out her… sort of boyfriend was a serial killing Strigoi wannabe, intent on changing her, and she'd seen him die in front of her.

I could read between the lines and see she needed comfort; she needed to hear that the pain would eventually go away, and that she'd forget about what she'd felt for him, but I couldn't give her that. All I could tell her was how _I'd_ felt, and for me, nothing had eased the ache inside. Could she handle hearing that I'd felt half dead when Dimitri was taken from me and that the pain had _never_ gone away until he was finally back in my arms? Did I tell her that no, dating Adrian hadn't dulled the pain in the slightest, it had only masked the grief by forcing me to focus on something other than the agonizing hole in my soul that only Dimitri could fill?

Her other questions were just as difficult, because as much as she pleaded with me to be truthful, I knew the answers would hurt her. After all, she was tied to Adrian's emotions, so what I said would indirectly affect her. I had a feeling that pointing out that her bond mate had been able to see my aura and should have accepted my true feelings wouldn't win me any points with her. Neither would stating that I'd been honest with Adrian—well, had been up until the end. From the very beginning he knew how I felt about Dimitri; he'd seen the way we felt for each other the first time he saw us together but had determinedly ignored it, convinced he could change my mind and replace him in my heart.

Did I tell Jill that I'd tried to have a relationship with Adrian only because he'd demanded it in exchange for loaning me the money I'd so desperately needed? Should I say that I felt guilty for trying to lessen my overwhelming pain by pretending I could move on even though I knew that it was impossible? My feelings for Dimitri had never wavered, not for a single, solitary minute. Even when he was Strigoi I'd loved him, and in all honesty, if he'd said the same to me—that he loved me—that night on the bridge, as opposed to just saying he wanted me… well, our lives might have had a very different ending, because I never would have staked him. I would have remained in Russia by his side; I would have let him awaken me, and poor Adrian's heart would never have been broken. But how do you say that to a fifteen year old girl who's just lost someone she cared about in the way she had?

Would she understand that yes, I had loved Adrian—and still did—but it wasn't the kind of love he'd wanted. I'd loved him as a dear friend, and that was something entirely different than the all consuming passion I felt for Dimitri. And if I told her that—in all honesty—Adrian had never really loved _me_ , but only the _thought_ of me, that in a weird, twisted way I was just another one of his many addictions, would she believe it?

Could she grasp why it was that Adrian was the last thing on my mind when Dimitri and I had _finally_ gotten back together at the motel, after so many trials and tribulations? How would she react to hearing that I hadn't even thought about him until afterwards—when the guilt struck—and even then it was centered around the fact that I never should have _dated_ Adrian in the first place? No matter what I'd promised before heading off to Russia, I knew I'd always belonged to Dimitri. I shouldn't have promised Adrian a chance at my heart, because it was no longer mine to offer; I had given it to Dimitri long before Adrian ever entered my life.

Sighing, I pulled my laptop closer, wanting to get the answer to at least one question out of the way. I knew I'd need a day or two to formulate an acceptable response to most of the questions, and I said as much, hoping she'd understand the reasoning behind it.

_Jill,_

_You're right. Those are some hard questions, and I'm not sure if you're really prepared for my answers. I promise I'll get to them, but give me a day or two to really think them over. For right now, I can answer one question with ease._

_When I got back with Dimitri—really got him back, not just as a dhampir but as my significant other, I felt alive for the first time in months. I felt like I could finally breathe again. In that moment I finally woke up from the most terrifying nightmare imaginable. It was the most wonderful feeling imaginable._

_I'll get back to you soon with the rest, just please remember, you asked me to be honest, and try not to judge me too harshly when I give my answers._

_Rose_

As soon as the message was sent I closed my laptop and tiptoed into the bedroom where my Russian god was napping. Curling up beside him, I rested my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. Even deeply asleep, he sensed my presence, rolling on his side and sliding a strong, muscled leg over mine while his arms surrounded me, pulling me close. I felt him press a kiss to the top of my head, and listened to him mumble my name in his sleep and it filled me with happiness.

Nestling my head under his chin I let myself drift off to the soft, even sound of his breathing, realizing that I had all the answers Jill needed, I just needed to figure out how to make her understand. It's funny how sometimes the easiest things in life are the hardest to explain.

All her questions had one thing in common. They all—in one way or another—hinged on this moment and a thousand others like it. The love Dimitri and I shared was the basis of all my actions, and I didn't regret a single one of the decisions I'd made. I would do the same things again in a heartbeat.

Being with the man I loved was worth every tear I'd cried and every battle I'd fought. It was worth every single argument and every ounce of pain. Dimitri's love was the fuel that stoked the fire within me, giving me the strength to face each day and whatever challenges I might have to face. It molded me and reshaped me into a better version of myself, and I knew that if I'd never met him, I wouldn't be half the woman I'd turned out to be. And even though I knew Lissa should come first, in the end, she didn't.

He did.

The love I shared with Dimitri was the most important thing in the world to me. It always had been, and it always would be. Someday when Jill found her other half, she'd understand. She'd realize that some things are more important than rules or creeds or even breathing. Until then… well, I guess she'd just have to hate me. I didn't like it, but I could live with it.

As long as I had Dimitri, I could handle anything.

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_**A/N: **_**I keep getting requests and prompts for one shots, and I really didn't want to post them all individually. I couldn't post them with the drabbles, because they're not. This new collection will not not affect the drabbles collection or the AB One Shots collection, this is simply going to be where I put any other one shots I write.  
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**Hope you enjoyed it, and if anyone wants to submit a prompt or request, just shoot me a pm or look me up on tumblr.  
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**tumblr:  
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**samwysesr (personal) **

**guardianrozahathaway, guardianrosemazurhathaway or guardianrosemhathaway (RP accounts)**

**This one was requested by Aimee Ivashkov on tumblr. Thanks Aimee, you always know how to kick start my muse.**

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	2. Friendship Is A Bond Too

**_Friendship Is A Bond Too || Lissa x Rose friendship fluff || For Josie aka .com_**

It was unusual for me to be awake and functioning so early in the day. Everyone who knows me is aware of how much I value my sleep, so much so that they generally go out of their way to avoid waking me up for fear of incurring my anger. But today I had something that had to be done, and if everything went according to plan, sacrificing a few hours of sleep would be totally worthwhile. I was so determined to make sure things went off without a hitch that the night before I'd set my clock ahead by an hour and a half, in an attempt to fool myself into thinking I'd had my normal amount of sleep, and surprisingly enough, it seemed to have worked. For once I was out of bed before Dimitri—although I'll admit it was hard to get up and leave with him laying there sprawled out across our bed. Even asleep the man looked sexy as hell, making me want to crawl right back in beside him.

I was dressed and out the door in record time, scooping up the bag I'd prepared the night before and scurrying across the silent grounds of court, determined to stick to the schedule I'd made. No one knew about what I had planned except for one person, and he'd sarcastically dubbed my mission 'operation kidnap the Queen'. Christian was probably the last person in the world I would have confided in, but he loved Lissa too, and he agreed with my belief that she needed to take a day off, whether she wanted to or not.

Lissa never took time for herself anymore—something I could understand, seeing as she was the queen—and it was starting to take a toll on her. She'd been more excitable lately, her moods changing so quickly it often left people staring at her speculatively, and that was what had take action. Hell, even Queens deserved to kick back and relax once in a while, and it was practically mandatory for a queen like ours who lived with the threat of spirits darkness affecting her. Between the two of us, Christian and I had intimidated Lissa's secretary into rearranging her schedule, so now, unbeknownst to her, she had a whole day off with nothing to do other than enjoy some time with her best friend—something that we hadn't had a chance to do since running our world had taken over her life.

Approaching the Royal apartment, I pulled out my phone, sending Christian a quick text to let him know that I was almost there. We'd arranged it so that he'd be waiting near the entrance, ready to escort me in. After what had happened to Queen Tatiana, not even the queen's best friend was granted admittance into her residence while she was sleeping. Since it kept Liss safe I wasn't complaining, but I have to admit it irritated me at times—this being one of them.

"Took you long enough," Christian muttered as soon as he opened the door. "What'd you do, stop off for donuts on the way over?"

Shooting him a disparaging look I ignored his snarky question, brushing past him and entering the expansive entryway of Lissa's private residence. It was a beautiful place, just as elegant and classy as the woman who resided there. "Is she still in bed?"

He nodded, sliding on his jacket and giving me a typical Christian Ozera glare. "Of course she is—isn't that why you planned to get here so damned early?"

Resisting the urge to stick my tongue out at him, I smiled, knowing that he could probably tell I was fighting back the urge to suggest he go screw himself. I'd never admit it to another living soul, but he and I were so alike that at times it was almost scary. "Thanks for your help Sparky. Don't let the door slamming you in the ass slow you down on your way out."

Not waiting for a response—because honestly, if Christian and I started trading insults we'd be there all day—I made my way down the hall, nodding at the guardians stationed outside the door and letting them sift through my bag, biting my tongue the entire time. Even though Christian had filled them in on the plan, there was no way they were going to let me in that room until they made sure I had no weapons—never mind the fact that even without a weapon, I was deadly, having trained my whole life to kill, the same way they had. "Satisfied now? I whispered, glaring at them, "Or do you think I'm gonna attempt to kill her with a bottle of frigging fingernail polish?"

Zipping the bag back up I cracked open the door, tiptoeing into the room where the young Moroi Queen was sleeping. When I reached the bed, I couldn't help but be transported back, remembering all the times that I'd stayed with the Dragomir's growing up, and the way Liss and I had always started off each day. Without really thinking about it, I gave into the moment, unable to stop myself. Launching myself up on the bed I began jumping up and down, laughing as she shot upright, a startled expression on her face. It was only when she opened up her mouth to scream that I stopped, dropping down beside her so she could see it was only me and not some masked assassin.

"Rose! What on earth is wrong with you! I thought I was under attack!"

"Sorry, you looked so peaceful that I couldn't resist." Reaching over pushed a piece of pale blonde hair off her face, smiling at the sight of my normally immaculately groomed friend with a serious case of bed head. "It's time to rise and shine."

Rubbing at her eyes she glanced over at the clock, then did a double take and groaned when she noticed the time. "My first meeting isn't until eight—I don't have to be in the council room for another two hours."

Unable to keep a self-satisfied smirk off my face, I laughed. "You've got longer than that Liss—your first meetings been canceled. Matter of fact, all of them have. You've got the whole day to—"

"What the hell do you mean '_all of them have'_," she snapped, cutting me off and narrowing her eyes.

"You needed a day off, so I got you one." I studied her expression, unable to hide my surprise at hearing her curse.

"Some of those meeting have been scheduled for _six months_ Rose! You can't just—"

"Well I did," I interjected, "and it's too late to do anything about it now. Your relaxing is more important than those meetings. Besides, I never get to see you anymore—"

"I can't believe you!" She stood up, glaring at me as she pulled her robe on. "We see each other almost every single day!"

I got to my feet, my hands clenched into fists at my side. Her anger had ignited my own, and I was struggling to control my temper and keep my tone of voice low and even. Not because I was intimidated because she was queen, but simply because she was my best friend and I didn't want to fight with her. "Me standing on the wall guarding you while you meet with a bunch of Royals discussing stupid budgets isn't the same thing as us spending time together, and you damn well know it!"

"What I know," she said, her voice cold and emotionless, "is that you're still the exact same selfish, irresponsible girl you were back at the academy. I thought being with Dimitri was helping you mature, but obviously I was wrong."

I jerked back, her words having the same effect as if she's physically struck me. It stung to hear her say that, because the truth of the matter was, I'd given up a lot in order to surprise her with this. It was my day off, and Dimitri's too, and instead of spending the day with him, the way I normally would, I'd chosen to spend it with her. "Lissa—"

"This isn't like school Rose! I can't just fake being sick because you want to sneak off and have fun, for God's sake!" She was pacing now, her movements almost frenzied, and that in itself tipped me off almost as much as her uncharacteristic outburst.

I cautiously approached her, reaching into my pocket for the thin silver band that I always carried with me. As soon as I'd realized the bond was gone, I'd contacted Oksana, and she had kindly agreed to provide me with spirit charmed jewelry as often as it was needed. Lightning fast I struck, my hand darting out and catching hold of hers, sliding the ring on her finger and refusing to let go, not wanting her to remove it. "This isn't you Liss. It's the darkness."

"Goddamn it Rose! You can't blame the darkness every time I don't agree with you! You have to grow up and realize…" She let her voice trial off, looking slightly confused, as if she couldn't remember what she'd been saying. Realizing this was the only opportunity I might have, I launched into an explanation, keeping a firm grip on her hand the entire time, waiting for the ring to work its magic.

"I blame the darkness because I recognize it Lissa—I lived with it every day, remember? That's part of the reason I wanted you to take the day off—I could tell it was starting to get to you. As for the other part… well, it's because I miss my best friend." I stared at her, willing her to hear my, and to understand what I was saying. "It's been so long since we just hung out and had fun together—the way we did before Dimitri took us back to Saint Vlad's. Remember what it was like when we were out on our own? How on Friday's after school we'd stop off at Blockbuster and pick up some crappy movies, then stay up late pigging out on junk food and just… acting like normal teenage girls?"

I could see my words taking effect, working in tandem with the ring to calm her. Her angry expression was fading, her face softening slightly as the tension slowly left her body. "It was fun, she agreed, a small smile replacing her scowl. "Giving each other manicures and trying out new hairstyles while we gossiped about the people at school."

I nodded, releasing her hand and bending to pick up the bag that I'd dropped beside the bed. Unzipping it, I upended it, spilling the contents over the rumpled sheets. "Look—I brought movies… and gummy worms… junior mints… nail polish too. I just wanted us to have a day to ourselves. A day where we weren't the Queen and her guardian, but just Lissa and Rose, without all the bullshit that's taken over our lives."

She approached the bed, picking up a movie and gazing at it thoughtfully for a few minutes before nodding. "You're right. I _do _need a day like that. And… I'm sorry Rose .About what I said. I didn't mean it."

Releasing a breath that I hadn't realized I was holding, I reached over and pulled her into my arms, relieved that the ring had worked—at least for now, anyway. It wasn't a permanent solution, but until I could come up with a better one, it was better than nothing. "I know Liss. Forget about it. I already have."

We spent the day exactly like I'd planned, doing nothing other than enjoying our time together. After several hours, when the junk food was all gone, when I was intent on painting her toenails a bright, starting pink, I heard a noise that surprised me, because it was something I hadn't heard for far, far too long. Glancing up, I saw my best friend, her face contorted as she tried not to laugh. "Liss?" My confused tone must have been too much for her, because the next thing I knew, she was laughing so hard that her foot moved, causing me to coat half of her toe pink. "What the hell Lissa?"

"I'm sorry," she wheezed out, "But your face…. And… your tongue was out because you were concentrating so hard. God Rose… You cancelled my budget meetings because they were 'unimportant', but you're staring at my foot as if it will be a national disaster if you make a little mistake. It's just… so _you_ Rose!"

"Well thanks," I said dryly, attempting to wipe the polish off her skin. "I'm glad you find my attention to detail so amusing."

"That's just it… only you would be so detail oriented when it comes to something like this, and so dismissive of the other stuff." She reached down and pulled me up beside her, still trying to control her giggles. "You keep me grounded in a way no one else can. You make me see that sometimes there are things more important than the meetings and the dinners and the endless politics. I need to make more time to spend with the people I love."

I glanced over at her, and was pleased to note the happy expression on her face. Lately she'd taken to wearing a regal mask, but right now, it was gone, and for the first time in a long time, I saw my best friend smiling back at me. "That's what Christian and I have been trying to tell you," I said gently.

"You may have to remind me again a time or two," she said, "but I promise I won't get quite so angry next time."

I grinned at her, knowing that when she found out I had the same thing planned for next week, she'd pitch a fit—but it would be worth it. "I'll hold you to that Your Majesty."

And I would too. The spirit bond that had tied us together was gone, but another bond existed between us—one that was far older and far stronger, dating all the way back to our very first day of kindergarten. Friendship was a powerful bond all on its own, and I'd do everything in my power to keep it in place and to protect her from the darkness, even if it meant incurring the Moroi Queens wrath on a weekly basis.

After all, what's a little anger between friends?


	3. An Unexpected Saviour

_**A/N: One shot about Abe Mazur, involving an oc named Grigori Orlov. This is unedited and un proofed, so please excuse/forgive any errors.**_

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It had been this way for as long as he could remember. The other small dhampir boys and girls looked forward to the twice daily recreational recess times, happy for the chance to be out of the classrooms and away from their books, excited to run and play with their friends, savoring thirty minutes of freedom before having to return to their studies. But he didn't—in fact, he dreaded it so much that just the thought of them made his stomach clench with anxiety.

Because every day, like clockwork, as soon as he settled himself away from the others, beneath one of the many large, towering trees that were scattered across the sprawling grounds of Saint Basils, it began. One by one the other young boys would gather in a cluster nearby, whispering amongst themselves in voices pitched just loud enough to reach his keen ears. Taunts about the shabby, threadbare clothing he wore, or mocking comments concerning the fact that he was an orphan abandoned here—a ward of the academy with nowhere else to go.

There were others like him—many in fact, who had lost their families in the same way he had. Strigoi attacks were far too common in the small, outlying Siberian communes, and any surviving children without relatives to claim them were promptly delivered to the academy to begin their training, no matter what their age might be. So the fact that the other orphaned children joined in, taking part in the constant harassment towards him was puzzling, to say the least. It was just another thing that made his waking hours a living hell and kept him awake long into the night when his mind replayed the day's events, making sleep impossible.

He couldn't understand why the others hated him so—he'd tried to make friends time and time again, but his attempts were always harshly rebuffed. And as if the dhampirs attitudes weren't bad enough, lately the Moroi students had begun joining in. Every day it seemed the confrontations were becoming more physical; first it was someone shoving him from behind as he exited the classroom, or his books were knocked askew by someone running down the hall, until it had escalated to the point where he was being challenged every time he entered the schoolyard. The fact he refused to fight, walking away so he wouldn't get in trouble only made the teasing a hundred times worse. At only six and a half years old, he dreaded getting up in the morning, his mind in a constant state of turmoil over interacting with his schoolmates.

But today… today they'd gone too far and he'd reached his breaking point.

Xavier Badica—one of the snobbiest of the Royal students—had called his deceased mother a blood whore, something that was far, far from true. His mother had been an acclaimed guardian—one who had fallen in love with her Royal charge. Not wanting to subject the woman he loved to the scorn the Moroi world would show her, his father had chosen to abandon his title, settling in the village where his new bride had been raised, and there they'd been blissfully happy. They hadn't had much money, but he and his two older brothers and his small, younger sister had been raised in a loving home, something that he thought was infinitely more important than anything else in the world.

"Take it back," he said, his voice holding a note of warning that the other boy ignored.

"Can't handle the truth Orlov?" Xavier gave him a taunting smile, reaching out and shoving him backwards a few steps.

"My mother was a guardian! She died trying to protect my father—"

"You mean the man you _thought _was your father," the Moroi cut him off, smiling so broadly his small fangs showed. "How can you be sure? She probably spread her legs for so many men she couldn't keep track. If she'd been a guardian, your family will still be alive. You have no one, and it's all your blood whore mothers fault."

A sound of pure rage escaped the young dhampir as he launched himself at the other boy, but he didn't make it far because a strong hand clasped down on his shoulder, stilling his forward movement. He struck out at the adult, not caring—for once—that hitting a teacher would land him in a great deal of trouble. All he could focus on were those hateful words, echoing over and over in his head. Words that were made even more hateful by the images that they called from the recesses of his memory—his mother desperately fighting off four Strigoi on her own, trying to protect her family, only to have her throat ripped out in a spray of crimson blood when one got under her guard.

"Shhhh. Calm down Grisha. It's alright son. You know it's not true." The deep, soothing voice halted his frenzied movements, and he stared at the adult—not a teacher, but a strangely dressed Moroi man that he'd never seen before. He studied him with bleary, tear filled eyes, taking in his expensive looking suite and bright orange tie and the glint of gold at his ears and the many rings on his fingers, as well as his dark, dark eyes, wondering who he was, and how exactly he knew the name his parents had called him.

"You're wrong, you know," the man said, looking around the gathering of students. "He has someone to take care of him. _Me._" He slid his arm around Grigori's thin shoulders, pulling him close to his side before continuing. "You—the mouthy one—you're Radu Badica's boy, aren't you? Tell me, kid, do you know who I am?"

The young Moroi had a look of what could only be described as pure fear on his face as he nodded. "Zmey… I mean, Mr. Mazur, sir."

His words made Grigori look up at the man with wide, confused eyes. He'd heard about the Moroi—his father had often spoke of him, and many nights he and his siblings had sat in front of the fire, listening to their father tell them stories about Zmey's daughter and her husband, tales of the many battles they'd bravely fought and won, slaughtering so many Strigoi that the numbers were incalculable. Since coming to the academy he'd heard even more stories, ones that labeled the man a mobster—someone you did not cross if you valued your life.

"Very good. You see young Badica, a long time ago, Grigori's father was… a business associate of mine. One that I happened to considered a very good friend as well. I admired the man greatly, and I don't appreciate the things I overheard you saying about his lovely wife." Zmey's voice was low and soft, but his tone was dangerous, making Grigori tense a little beside him.

"I… I'm sorry sir," Xavier stammered out, looking as if her were about to piss himself in fear.

"It's not me you should be apologizing to kid." Zmey gave the boy a pointed look, moving Grigori in front of him and clasping his hands on his shoulders. You might say I consider young Grigori… family. I suppose you could consider me his godfather. I'll be looking after him from now on."

Xavier looked like he was having trouble breathing, and the other students were slowly edging back, their eyes never leaving the sharply dressed man. "I'm sorry Grigori. I didn't mean it." He looked up at the man, and when he spoke his voice was shaky. "It won't happen again sir. May I be excused, please?"

Zmey studied the boy for a moment, his dark eyes narrowed. "Your father owes me a great deal of money, kid. He's gonna hear about this. You just increased his debt by ten percent. Now get the hell out of here before you do something to piss me off even more."

Grigori watched his classmate scurry away so fast that he stumbled, almost losing his footing and falling in his haste. "Wow. Everybody says you're scary. I guess they're right."

Zmey chuckled, steering the boy to a nearby bench and shoving him down on it before crouching in front of him. "I'm sorry about your family, Grisha. I've been out of the country or I would have been here sooner. I meant what I said—your father was a good man, and I respected him. There aren't many out there who would give up what he did in order to be with your mother."

Grigori picked at the frayed fabric of his jeans, widening the already gaping hole at the knee. "I don't normally fight, sir. I avoid it. But what he said about mama…" He trailed off, swiping at his eyes, not wanting to cry and look like a baby.

"Do you wanna know why they pick on you kid? I've been watching you in your classes all day, and I'm a pretty observant guy." Zmey rose, settling himself on the bench beside him. "You have a natural air about you. You carry yourself like a Royal Moroi—something that the other dhampirs don't like. You're your fathers son, through and through. And you're smart. That makes for a powerful combination. Trust me, brains count."

Grigori looked over at him, considering his words. He knew he was intelligent—his father had often commented on it—but he didn't think he acted that different from any other student. "I don't understand—"

"You're arrogant, without meaning to be." Zmey cut him off, chuckling. "I'm the same way, always have been. It's not a bad thing, son. It makes people sit up and take notice of the things you say. You'll find that out when you get older." His dark eyes traveled over Grigori, and his face took on a serious expression. "I'm gonna look after you now. You're father would want that, and it's the least I can do for him." He stood up, straightening out his suit coat before reaching down and pulling the small boy to his feet. "Come on, let's go see the headmistress. First thing we gotta do is get you some decent clothes. After that, we'll see about arranging for you to come stay with me for a few weeks, so we can get to know each other."

For the first time since his family had been slaughtered, a shy, hesitant smile broke out across Grigori's normally solemn face. "Thank you Mr. Mazur, I'd like that a lot."

"Call me Abe, kid. Mr. Mazur makes me feel like an old man."

Nodding, Grigori followed after him, and after hesitating for a moment he reached out and slid his small hand into the man's, looking up at him with an expression of devotion. He'd call the man Abe, because he'd asked him to, but it seemed disrespectful, to say the least. Because in his mind, Zmey wasn't the notorious business man his father had fondly described, or the dangerous mobster his schoolmates gossiped about—he was a guardian angel, swooping in to save him from the misery his life had become.

And Grigori would never, ever forget that.


	4. Secrets and Promises

**For Eli—princessjilldragomir. tumblr****_ .com_**

_**Unedited and un-proofed, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes.**_

* * *

It was supposed to be a quick trip, taking no more than a day—and most of that would be travel time. I wasn't thrilled to be leaving, but in all honesty, I was the only one really qualified to go. Out of the handful of people who knew the location of the Dragomir princess, I was the one who had firsthand knowledge of what it was like to be bonded to a spirit user. The plan was extremely simple—I was flying down to check on Jill then turning around and coming right back home.

Of course, things rarely go according to plan—especially when I'm involved.

The flight to Palm Springs went off without a hitch, although I'll admit that being trapped in a plane with a bunch of strangers had left me pretty cranky. My mood didn't improve in the slightest when I stopped off to pick up the rental car that Dimitri had arranged for me. Biting my tongue, I took the packet from the representative, not wanting to unleash my irritation on her, storming off to find the vehicle in question.

I'd just climbed behind the wheel and was examining the map that the agent had handed me when my phone rang, and I could resist letting the caller know exactly what I thought of his automotive choice as soon as I answered. "I swear to God I'm beginning to think you're obsessed with Hondas Comrade. Is this some kind of sick fetish that I should be aware of?"

"They're reliable and have an impressive safety record—that's something I have to take into consideration with the way you drive."

Since I could hear the amusement in his voice, I let the insult to my driving skills slide. "What's up? You can't be missing me already—I haven't even been gone six hours yet."

"I started missing you as soon as you boarded the plane Roza." His husky, accented voice was completely serious, without a hint of teasing to it at all, and a chill raced down my spine that didn't have anything to do with the air conditioning—which I had on full blast to combat the desert heat. It was just the effect that Dimitri had on me, and I was instantly filled with an intense longing to be back home—by his side—where I belonged.

"I miss you too," I said, my voice soft, "but I'll be back later tonight."

"I know…. I was calling to remind you to be careful. There may still be a few members—"

I cut him off, wanting to reassure him. "Don't worry. Nothing's going to happen. I'm driving straight to Amberwood and then back to the airport. No detours."

"Roza, I can't help but worry. I know how you are." He sighed, and I couldn't help but smile a little. I'd killed more Strigoi than I could count, and yet still he was worried about me running afoul of a group of vampire hunting humans.

"I'll call you after I meet with Jill. Okay?"

"I'll be waiting. I love you."

"Love you too. Bye."

Ending the call, I returned my gaze to the map, my mood greatly improved—which was probably a good thing. I'd soon be dealing with a fifteen year old who held a grudge against me, so the last thing I needed was to be pissed off before the meeting even began. Once upon a time, Jill had actually looked up to me, but that had changed the minute her bond with Adrian had formed. Until she learned to block him out, she was constantly under assault from his emotions—and since the majority of his feeling towards me were negative ones, Jill's opinion of me had plummeted, which meant her reaction to seeing me would be lukewarm, at best.

Sighing, I folded the map—okay, I crumpled it and tossed it in the passenger seat—and put the car in gear, pulling out of the parking lot and heading across town to the suburb where the school was located. The sooner I got this over with, the sooner I'd be home. The one thing that none of us had really thought through was how exactly I was supposed to access Jill once I arrived. Amberwood was a pretty exclusive place, so the fact I didn't belong there would be glaringly obvious, to say the least. For once, luck was on my side, because as soon as I parked in the visitor lot and climbed out of the car, I spotted a familiar face walking across campus. Almost as if he felt the weight of my gaze, he turned his head, his eyes scanning the grounds. When they came to rest on me, he stopped dead in his tracks, and the shocked expression on his face was so comical that I had to laugh. I jogged over to where he was standing, and as soon as I was close enough to speak without fear of someone overhearing, I couldn't resist teasing him a little. "What's wrong Castile? You look like you've seen a ghost?"

"What are you doing here?" Eddie's handsome face crinkled up with worry, his eyes darting around as if he expected to see Moroi rebels lurking behind every bush. "Has someone found out where we are?"

"Relax—I'm just here to see Jill. Lissa wanted me to make sure she's handling the bond okay."

"Does she know you're here?"

"Not yet. As a matter of fact, I was kinda hoping you'd go get her for me. I figured the staff would probably have a problem with a strange woman roaming the halls."

He tensed, and before he spoke, I knew that whatever he was about to say was something that would piss me off. "I think you should come back later. Surprising her isn't the best idea. You'd be better off letting me break it to her, and giving her time to get used to the idea."

I could feel my bad mood slowly regaining ground. It didn't help that this trip had thrown my natural schedule out of whack; having to conform to a human schedule meant that I'd been up for almost 22 hours straight. "Look—I'm here because Lissa asked me to come. The sooner you go get her the sooner I can get out of here. Don't give me any grief over this Eddie, okay?"

I don't know whether he heard a warning in my voice or if my expression gave something away—more than likely Eddie just knew me well enough to know how far he could push me before I pushed back—but he made the smart choice and decided to do what I'd asked without further argument. I sank down on the grass to wait, closing my eyes and tilting my face up, spending a few minutes enjoying the warm feel of the sun on my skin. As a dhampir I spent most of my life on a nocturnal schedule, and a part of me always missed moments like this, craving a little time in the daylight. I have no idea how long I sat there like that; I'm ashamed to admit I almost dozed off. It was the sound of Jill's indignant voice that jerked me awake, alerting me of their arrival.

"What's _she _doing here?"

"_She's_ come to talk to you," I retorted, standing up and brushing off my jeans. "God Jill, I knew you wouldn't be thrilled to see me, but I didn't think you'd be so damned rude about it—I just flew across the country to make sure you were doing okay, you know."

My words had the desired effect—her petulant frown transformed into a ruefully embarrassed look, her pale skin blushing slightly. Jill was a friendly girl; it wasn't in her nature to be openly hostile to people—even ones she didn't like. Glancing over at Eddie, she ducked her head, hiding behind her hair. "Sorry—I'm just… surprised to see you. Someone should have warned me you were coming."

"Spur of the moment decision."Something about the way she was behaving instantly peaked my interest. Call it a gut instinct, or maybe it was just all the years I'd spent training to observe the people around me, but there was something decidedly strange about the way she was acting. It wasn't the darkness at all—rather, it was as if she was uncomfortable with the situation we found ourselves in. Only it wasn't just my presence that bothered her. She seemed upset that I chastised her in front of Eddie, but why? Studying her, I noted the way she held her body, and that in itself tipped me off almost as much as the furtive glances she kept making at the man beside her.

Jill was crushing on Eddie—her primary guardian.

I opened my mouth to say something, and then caught myself. This wasn't the kind of thing that should be discussed with the object of her affection standing nearby. "Is there someplace where we can talk? In private?" I added, shooting a pointed glance at Eddie.

"We could go to my room, I guess."

She looked less than thrilled by the prospect, so I latched onto it before she could rescind the offer. "Great. Lead the way. I'll take it from here Eddie.

"But… Jill, are you gonna be okay?" He looked torn, and I understood why. He knew my presence upset her, but I was here under the Queens orders, so he couldn't exactly interfere.

"She'll be fine," I answered for her rolling my eyes in an attempt to show how ridiculous he was being. "We're just going to spend a half hour or so catching up. You know, girl talk."

It was hard to say who looked more surprised at my statement, but it did the trick. I followed Jill across the campus and into her dorm, neither of us saying a word. We made it all the way to her room before the silence finally got to me; before I knew what was happening, I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head.

"So does Eddie return your feelings?"

Jill paused, her key halfway to the lock, glancing over at me with her mouth agape. "What?"

"Oh come on, it's obvious!"I winced as soon as I said it, knowing I should have phrased it better.

"You don't know what you're talking about, as usual." Her voice was low and harsh sounding, her tone letting me know she didn't want to discuss it.

"Jill… I—"

"Eddie has been… seeing Angeline," she said, shooting me a dark look, "So whatever you thought you saw… you were wrong." Unloking the door she shoved it open, leaving me staring after her, stunned.

It took me a minute to process what she was saying, because it seemed unfathomable. Eddie was all about duty, he had been ever since the incident in Spokane. If he was really involved with Angeline—who was for all intents and purposes his guarding partner—it was a serious conflict of interest. A Guardian had to be prepared to put their charge above all else—and when you got involved with your partner, it blurred the lines. It was the reason the Badica's Guardians had run off together. Hell—for that matter, it was why Dimitri and I had denied our love for such a long time. Given my own experience in the matter, my reaction was hypocritical and I knew it, but it's hard to go against a lifetimes worth of training "One of them will have to resign. They can't endanger you like that Jill. It's—"

"Rose! Just let it go! This isn't like court, and they don't let it interfere with guarding me. You _know_ Eddie. He'd never let something like that stop him from keeping me safe!"Her eyes were bright, and she looked more impassioned than I'd ever seen her look about anything.

"You really like him a lot, don't you," I asked, unable to help myself.

"It doesn't matter—he doesn't feel the same way." The fire went out of her as she flopped face down on her bed, burying her face in one of the pillows.

Her misery hung around her like a cloud, and my heart went out to her. She was only fifteen and in the span of a few short months her entire world had been turned upside down—something we all tended to forget. She'd gained a sister, but in all honesty, it was in name only. Lissa treated the entire situation like a dirty little secret, and in my opinion, she'd been relieved to have a reason to send Jill off to school—it meant she didn't have to face her every day. It was one of the few things Lissa and I disagreed on, and since my best friend could be just as stubborn as I was, it wasn't likely that I'd be changing her mind anytime soon.

"Jill… Whatever problems exist between Adrian and me… you can talk to me… About Eddie, or the bond… or even about Lissa. You don't have to keep it all trapped inside. I'm still your friend and I want to help you."

"Yeah, right."

"I mean it Jill." I sank down beside her, hesitating for a moment then reaching over to stroke her back in what I hoped was a soothing gesture. Comforting people wasn't something I was particularly good at, but I felt like I had to try. "Whatever you say stays in this room—just between us."

"Even if it's about Lissa?" She turned her head, peeking out at me from underneath her hair. I nodded and smiled a little, waiting for her to continue.

"She hates me. It's not my fault that our father did what he did… but she acts like it is. She blames me and I—"

"She doesn't." I cut her off, needing to set her straight. "Yes, it's been hard for her to accept, but that's understandable." I paused, thinking about the relationship Lissa had with Eric Dragomir. She'd held him up on a pedestal, thinking he could do no wrong. Hell, I had too—he'd been sort of a father substitute for me while I was growing up. He'd been everything I'd wanted in a parent; a kind, loving man who adored his wife and daughter. "I think everyone sees their parents in a certain way, and when something happens and you find out they're completely different than what you imagined… well, it's hard to wrap your head around."

My words came from the heart, because I'd spent a lot of time thinking about my relationship with my own mother lately. For years I'd been convinced that she didn't care about me at all. Recently we'd begun trying to repair the damage that her years of neglect had caused, and we were slowly getting to know each other. It was a slow and sometimes painful process, but one I thought would be worthwhile. I'd always envied Lissa's close, loving relationship with Rhea, and while I knew my mom and I would never have something that perfect, I hoped we could at least be friends instead of fighting all the time.

"All my life I wanted a sister. I knew she wouldn't be thrilled at first… but I thought…" Jill's voice trailed off and she swiped at her cheek; I looked away before she realized I'd noticed she was crying.

"She just needs a little time to accept it Jill."

"Stop taking up for her! How can you be so blindly loyal to some people, but throw away the ones that care so much about you?" She sat up, glaring at me. "I don't know why I'm even talking to you, after the way you treated Adrian!"

"Jill—" I shook my head, not wanting to get into the intricacies of what had happened with a fifteen year old. "There's a lot of things you don't understand about what happened between Adrian and me."

"You were dating him—you cheated on him and broke his heart. What more is there to understand? I may be younger than you, but I'm not stupid Rose," she snapped.

"I can't help it if I didn't love him like that!" My own temper flared to life, my voice raising as I stood up and began pacing. "It's not my fault he can't let go of something that was never meant to be in the first place."

She laughed, and it was almost a scornful sound. "God, you really are full of yourself aren't you? Do you honestly think he's still hung up on you Rose? I hate to break it to you, but he hasn't given you a second thought since he fell in love with—" She stopped abruptly, her eyes widening as she looked away, suddenly seeming extremely interested in the poster hanging on her wall.

"He's found someone?" The thought thrilled me—I desperately wanted Adrian to find a love like the one I shared with Dimitri, and not just because it might mean we'd finally be able to patch up our differences and I'd get my friend back. He was a good man, and he deserved someone who would love him whole heartedly, without holding anything back. "That's really great Jill! Why keep it a secret?"

Something about the look on her face kicked my brain into gear, and I realized at once why she looked so horrified by what she'd let slip. From researching the area, I knew that there weren't any Moroi females residing in Palm Springs, and the only dhampir around was Angeline—who according to Jill was hooking up with Eddie. Which meant that Adrian—in his typical, reckless, unconventional fashion—had fallen in love with a human, something that was completely forbidden. I sank back down on the bed beside her, stunned. "Oh no… Please tell me he didn't. Not even he could be that stupid."

"You can't say anything Rose! The only reason I know is because of the bond. Please! Promise me you won't tell Lissa or anyone back home!" She grabbed my hand, squeezing it, her expression pleading with me to agree.

I rubbed my forehead with my free hand, suddenly so tired that it was hard for me to think straight. This was just too much, pushing me past my point of reason. "Who is it?"

"It doesn't matter—they both know nothing can come of it. But Rose—you of all people should know… you can't help who you fall in love with."

I studied her, and something about the set of her jaw told me that there was no way I'd be getting the girls name from her. "I won't say anything to anyone back at court Jill. But… You need to talk to him. Make him see reason before he's in too deep. Otherwise he's going to end up hurt again, and neither one of us wants that."

"Is that a promise? You really won't say anything? Not even to Dimitri?"

"I tell Dimitri everything Jill, but he won't say anything." I sighed, running my fingers through my hair. "Now that you've dropped that little bombshell, how are things going with the bond? Any problems?"

We talked a bit more, about spirit and ways she could practice blocking Adrian's emotions off—something she'd need to know if he was involved in a new romance. The last thing Jill needed was to get pulled into his head during sex—she got flustered just hearing me mention it. I tried to pay attention and answer all her questions, but a part of my mind wasn't on our discussion at all. It was on Adrian. The last thing he needed right now was to get his heart shattered again, and if he really and truly was in love with a human, it was bound to happen. No one would accept the pairing—even as liberal as I was about love, the thought made me feel sick. Some things were just too taboo even to consider, and hooking up with humans was pretty near the top of the list.

A knock at the door pulled me from my musings; Jill shot me a hesitant look before climbing off the bed, then opened the door a crack, sighing with relief when she saw who was on the other side.

"Are you okay? Angeline said you missed class—something about a visitor?"

As soon as I heard the voice I smiled, my mind suddenly at ease over the problem with Adrian. I wouldn't need Jill to find out more about the mystery girl. It was Sydney Sage's job to know everything going on with the group in Palm Springs, and if she didn't already have a name to give me, she'd be able to find it. The Alchemist had spent her whole life perfecting her research skills, so if anyone could track down exactly who Adrian had been spending time with, it was her.

"I think we're done here Jill," I said, walking over and opening the door wide so I could smile at Sydney. "But I do need to have a talk with Sydney before I leave for home."

Jill's eyes widened and that strange worried look was back on her face. "Rose—"

I shot her a reassuring look as I walked out the door. "Don't worry kiddo—I remember my promise. I won't be mentioning what we discussed to anyone at court."

And I wouldn't. But talking to the people in Palm Springs… well, that was something else entirely.


	5. Secrets and Promises Part Two

Secrets and Promises—Part Two || Drabble Request Sydney x Rose

**_Requested by: Anon_**

**_Dedicated to: Brooke aka imaquickstudy . tumblr. com_**

_Unedited, so please forgive any errors._

* * *

After I said my goodbyes to Jill, I turned to Sydney, eyeing her speculatively. She had a concerned expression on her face, probably wondering why I'd come to Palm Springs without giving any notice. I knew Sydney didn't like surprises, preferring to have things plotted out and scheduled, so my unexpected visit had thrown her off her game. Which was probably a good thing—considering the discussion I planned on having with her. She should have immediately notified us of Adrian's involvement with a human so we could've begun damage control before it was too late, and the fact she hadn't worried me. It either meant she was wasn't monitoring the group closely enough, or that he had somehow conned her into covering for him. Since I knew Sydney's feelings towards dhampirs and Moroi, I highly doubted she'd fall for Adrian's charm, which meant she was getting lax on her duties—something I never would have thought possible.

She didn't extend the same offer Jill had when I requested privacy for our chat—but I didn't take it personally. She was more tolerable of my kind than the other members of her organization, and I knew that in her own, strange way she considered me something of a friend—but even she had her limits. Having a dhampir in her room would be pushing her past her comfort level, so I didn't argue when she suggested a nearby coffee shop, I simply followed her over in my rental car.

It was a nice place, and I was pleased to see that they offered more than just coffee—always a good thing considering it didn't rank highly on my list of favorite things. While we waited in line I studied the selection of pastries displayed beneath a glass counter, something Sydney immediately noticed and felt the need to comment on. "You'd be better off getting a bagel—those things are loaded with sugar."

'That," I said dryly, "is the entire reason for eating them. Besides—I'm hungry and tired. The sugar will give me energy. Besides," I pointed to the display, "they have sugar free stuff too."

Surprisingly enough, that peaked her interest. When we finally got up to the counter she actually ordered a sugar free danish to go along with her drink. As soon as I heard her ask for it, an idea popped into my head. I ordered one too—making sure the guy understood I wanted a _real _one, opting for hot chocolate as opposed to the coffee she'd requested. Collecting our orders we settled at a table in the corner, and Sydney—just as I'd anticipated—went to the restroom to wash her hands. As soon as the door closed behind her I switched our plates. It wasn't a malicious act, I was genuinely concerned about her eating habits. Whenever I was in her presence I'd noticed her tendency to pick at her food, eating as little as possible. Since she thought it was sugar free, chances were she'd eat the whole thing—something she needed to do since she was far too skinny, in my opinion.

As soon as she came back and sat down, I stated what was on my mind. There was no point beating around the bush—when dealing with Sydney, the best approach was a straight forward one. "So tell me about Adrian's girlfriend."

Whatever she'd been expecting me to say, that clearly wasn't it. For once, the impeccable, unflappable Sydney Sage lost her composure, practically choking on her coffee. Rolling my eyes I picked at the danish, waiting for her coughing fit to subside. It was just as bland and disgusting and I'd expected it to be—after all, anything sugar free might as well have been labeled 'taste like cardboard'. When it looked as if she had regained control, I raised my eyebrows and gave her a small smile. "Well?"

"What makes you think—"

"Come on Sydney. Jill let it slip. I know he's involved with some human girl—and I want to know who she is."

She took a bite of her pastry, and I almost laughed at the surprised look on her face. "Wow, this is really good. Seriously Rose—you should have gotten one of these—it tastes just like the real thing. You'd never know it was sugarless."

"I bet." I gave her a pointed look, determined to keep the conversation on track and not be sidelined by her comments. "If you're done marveling over how great that tastes, can we get back to the subject at hand? I need a name."

"Why do you even care?" She shot back, "I was under the impression Adrian ceased to exist for you as soon as you had Dimitri back."

Her uncharacteristic sarcasm floored me. I leaned back in my chair, studying the irritated expression on her face for a moment before responding. "Wow. For a second there I could've almost sworn that Adrian was sitting across from me. That sounds like it came straight from his 1001 reasons to hate Rose Hathaway handbook."

A slight blush appeared on her cheeks, making the gilded tattoo on her cheek more prominent. "I shouldn't have said that… but he's finally starting to—"

"Get over me," I interrupted. "Yeah, I heard it all from Jill." I sighed, shaking my head at her. "You want to know why? Because even if he hates me, _I_ still _care _about _him. _He's my friend, and I don't want to see him get hurt."

"And you just assume that a relationship with a human will hurt him? That's a little hypocritical considering that it was a dhampir who tore his heart out."

I clenched my teeth so hard my jaw hurt, biting back my initial response. Anger wouldn't get me anywhere, and contrary to popular belief, I had managed to learn a tiny bit of control from Dimitri. "I thought I could talk to you about this. I thought we were friends… well, as close to friends as you can be with someone like me, but apparently I was wrong. You seem to have a problem with me, Sydney, and I'd like to know what it is I've done to piss you off."

She studied her coffee, not meeting my eyes. "I … I suppose we are… friends… but I'm his friend too. I remember what he was like when he first arrived here. He was…" She paused, and I was willing to bet she was searching for a word that wouldn't make me feel bad. Little did she know, anything she said was likely to hurt—because I was all to aware of my guilt where Adrian was concerned.

"Broken," I supplied in a quiet voice. "I know what I did to him, Sydney. That's why I want to make sure it doesn't happen again." I caught her gaze, determined to make her understand where I was coming from. "You know it's forbidden. It's the biggest taboo we have" She didn't say anything, but her jaw tensed, indicating that my words struck a chord in her. "Hell, I honestly can't believe we're sitting here arguing about it—I mean, you think it's wrong too."

She toyed with her plate, her eyes locked on the crumbs that were all that remained of her Danish, then sighed and shook her head. "What if he loves her?"

"Unfortunately, Adrian has a habit of falling in love with the wrong people. I'm proof of that."

She looked up at me, her eyes full of an emotion that I couldn't quite place. "What if she loves him too? Maybe the way they feel is more important than what other people think… Maybe what your people believe and what the Alchemist believe… what if it's wrong? What if some things are more important than the rules?"

For once in my life, I was completely speechless. Sydney had never struck me as a romantic, but apparently, beneath that brisk, businesslike exterior, she was one. She had to be if she was willing to overlook a lifetimes worth of training just to insure that Adrian had a chance at happiness. Not to mention the fact that I understood what she was saying—by falling in love, Dimitri and I had broken the rules too. "Sydney—"

My phone went off, and I muttered a curse, irritated at having the conversation interrupted. It was Dimitri, probably calling to check up on me. "What's up Comrade?"

"You were supposed to call me as soon as you saw the Princess, Rose," he said, gently chastising me.

"Sorry. Everything's fine. I'm with Sydney right now. There's a… situation I need to clear up before I come home."

He was silent for a moment. "What kind of _situation?_ Is it the Warriors?"

"No, nothing like that. Adrian… Adrian has gotten involved with a human. I figured Sydney could—"

"Rose," he cut me off, his voice stern, "let it go. It's not our business."

"But Dimitri, he—"

"I mean it Rose. This isn't something that concerns you. He's a grown man, capable of making his own decisions. Don't ask Sydney anything more about it."

The tone in his voice alerted me to the fact there was more going on than what he was saying. He was in full on mentor mode—expecting me to do what he said without questioning the reasoning behind it. "You knew! You fucking _knew _and you didn't tell me! Who is it?"

He was silent for so long that I was beginning to wonder if the call had dropped, but then I heard him sigh. "Roza, please… for me, just let this go and come home."

"How could you keep something like this from me? You know how people will react if—"

"Because I know what it's like to love someone you can't have. I remember how hard it was for me when we were at the academy. Wanting to tell you how I felt… wanting to be with you, but unable to because it was forbidden."

His words drained my indignant fury away in a rush. "You still should have told _me_," I said softly.

"You're right, and I'm sorry. Please Roza, we can talk about it when you get home."

Closing my eyes for a minute, I sighed in defeat. "Alright. Love you."

"And I love you. Be safe."

I set my phone on the table, intensely troubled by the conversation, already replaying it in my head. It wasn't like Dimitri to be so secretive—we told each other everything. I glanced across the table at Sydney, who was watching me with a wary expression on her face.

"Is everything alright?"

"To be honest, I'm not sure. Dimitri knew about this, and he didn't tell me." I shook my head, frowning. The thought of him keeping something so serious from me made me feel distinctly uneasy.

"I'm sure he had his reasons. You shouldn't let it worry you. I may not know a lot about relationships, but even I can tell yours is as solid as they come."

"I thought so too—until now. If he kept this from me, who knows what else he's hiding?" I gnawed at my lower lip, hating the uncertainty I was feeling.

"It's not right… you two fighting over this." She reached across the table and hesitantly touched my hand, and I was surprised at the concern in her eyes.

"Hey, it's not like it's your fault he didn't tell me."

She got the strangest look on her face, almost like she felt guilty. "No, but if I'd kept you up to date… you'd have known and not been surprised by it."

I smiled at her, wanting to reach out and hug her for being so worried on my behalf, but knowing she'd hate being touched by me. "Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal—we'll work it out. We've been through too much to let something stupid like this come between us. Regardless, he asked me not to involve you, so I won't.

We chatted for about ten more minutes, talking about Jill and how she'd been adapting. When enough time had passed that I was positive she'd think I'd let go of the Adrian issue, I glanced at my watch and made a point of heaving a big sigh. Pushing back my chair, I gathered my trash up and dumped it in a nearby can. "I need to get going—otherwise I might miss my flight." I failed to mention that I'd be making a stop first. Dimitri hadn't wanted me to involve Sydney, and I wouldn't. Instead I'd do what I should have done in the first place and go directly to the source of the problem.

I waited while she dumped her own trash, then she followed me out the door and walked me to my car. "It was good to see you again. Maybe next time we can spend some time catching up instead of discussing Adrian," she offered.

"Sounds good." I unlocked the car and opened the door, shooting her a guilty smile. "Oh, and Syd? The reason that Danish tasted so good was because it was mine—I swapped them while you were in the restroom."

Her mouth dropped open and she gave me a look of pure horror. "What? Why… Why would you do that? Do you know how many calories were in that thing? Honestly Rose I—"

"Because Sydney, you need to cut loose and live a little. You're way to strict on yourself when it comes to food… and you said it yourself— some things are more important than rules. Believe me, sweets are one of those things." Winking at her, I shut the door and started the car. As I pulled away I couldn't resist a peek in the rearview mirror, and I had to laugh at the expression on her face as she watched me drive away.

And let me tell you, it was worth every disgusting mouthful I'd eaten of her pastry, just to see her staring after me with a look of violence that could seriously rival one of my own. From here on out I'd have to watch my back whenever I encountered her, because she wouldn't forget what I'd done, and like they say, payback's a bitch.

Especially when the person dreaming it up was as smart as Sydney Sage.


	6. Discovering Loves Truth

**Discovering Loves Truth || Drabble turned Oneshot || Adrian x Rose**

_**Drabble requested by Anon**_

_**Dedicated to Garet, the most perfect Adrian Ivashkov imaginable (the-adrian-ivashkov) .tumblr .com**_

_**Not proofed or edited. Please forgive mistakes, but at this point, I'm sick of looking at this beast. At 6,447 words, it kicked my ass and even made me cry a little. I hope I did justice to the idea of Rose and Adrian finally finding peace and working their way towards mending their friendship.**_

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I'm sure there's some sort of protocol you're supposed to use when dropping in on an ex-boyfriends unannounced. Lissa could have reeled off a list of do's and don'ts, instructing me in whatever proper etiquette the situation called for, but this is me we're talking about—and let's face it, manners aren't exactly my strong suit. I mean, considering that I actually called our former queen a sanctimonious bitch it public—and that was actually a whole hell of a lot nicer than what I'd been thinking in my head at the time—the fact that I usually end up doing the exact _opposite_ of what most people consider socially acceptable should be pretty obvious. So even thought I _knew _I should probably call Adrian and give him a heads up, I didn't. But in my own defense, there was a specific reason for my actions.

After the initial outburst he'd had while I was recovering from being shot, Adrian had gone out of his way to avoid me. When we did run into each other, the encounters had been… less than friendly, to say the least. We either pointedly ignored each other—and the incredibly thick tension in the air between us—or we retorted to snapping at each other, exchanging thinly veiled insults. I didn't blame him—it was a bad situation, one that only time could heal. So if I had called to alert him of my visit, the chances of him refusing to see me were pretty damned high.

I was understandably anxious when I knocked on the door; Adrian had always been slightly unpredictable. As a spirit user, he was prone to spells of something that was almost like madness, and the last thing I wanted was for my surprise visit to push him over the edge. Waiting for him to answer the door, I second guessed myself, wishing I had at least thought to bring Jill with me, in the event he needed someone to help him with the darkness. At the very least she could have acted as an intermediary between us when the fighting started—and inevitably, it would. I heard his voice on the other side of the door, but couldn't quite make out his words, then the door was opening, and I was face to face with my one time boyfriend for the first time in months. I tensed, waiting for him to explode at the sight of me standing on his doorstep.

If didn't happen. Instead, he simply stared at me, his eyes widening slightly in surprise.

I honestly don't know who was more shocked at that point. I thought I'd prepared myself for having a face to face meeting with him, steeling myself not to react, no matter how bad he might appear. The last time I'd seen him had been the day we'd dropped the group off in Palm Springs, and to say he'd been a mess would have been putting it kindly. He'd been binging on his clove cigarettes and booze for weeks, partying hard, I assumed, in an effort to keep the memories of what had happened at bay. The man standing in front of me wasn't the irritable, hung over Adrian that I'd expected, but instead was a sober, healthier looking version. He was splattered from head to toe in paint, even having some in his hair, and I bit my lip in an effort not to smile, instinctively knowing my amusement would irritate him.

For one, tiny instant, his forehead crinkled up as he frowned; I could see a pained look in his eyes, one that disappeared so fast that it made me wonder if I had imagined seeing it in the first place. His lips curled up in his trademark smirk as he folded his arms across his chest and leaned against the doorframe. "Well well. This is a surprise. Tell me, why exactly is the Queen's head Guardian banging down my door?"

I tried to match his light, jovial tone, shrugging. "Would you believe I got lost and needed directions?"

He snorted in a very un-Adrian like manner. "That's a good one, but you'll have to do better than that. We both know that even if you took a wrong turn and ended up in the middle of the Pacific, you wouldn't admit you were lost Rose."

He stepped to the side, giving me a mock bow and gesturing for me to enter. "Mind if I ask what brings you to our sunny little Oasis?"

"Lissa needed someone to check on Jill. She was worried about how the darkness might be affecting her."

"I'm surprised Belikov didn't have a problem with this little visit," he said.

"He wasn't happy about it, considering the situation with the Warriors, but—"

He cut me off abruptly. "I meant you coming here... to see me."

That threw me for a minute. "Why would he care? He trusts me."

"I trusted you too—and look where it got me." There was no malice in his tone, only the slightest hint of reproach, and that made me feel a hundred times worse, making me flinch involuntarily.

"Adrian—"

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

I reached out, but dropped my hand unwilling to be rebuffed if I touched him. "Yes… yes, you should have. It's something we have to talk about, whether we want to or not. Better to get it all out in the open now so we can talk about—"

"Rose—"

"The reason I'm here." I continued on, ignoring his interruption. "I mean, I know—"

"Rose!" His voice was more forceful, and I stopped abruptly, giving him a pointed look. I hated being interrupted—and he knew it. "Let me clean up first, okay? Then we can hash it all out." He chuckled, looking down at his paint spattered clothes. "I'm going to take a quick shower—make yourself at home."

I nodded, looking around the apartment as he exited the room. It was nice, but not the kind of place I ever would have pictured Adrian living in. Before, his quarters had always been opulent; even when he'd stayed at the Academy, he'd been given the finest guest suite available, one befitting a member of the illustrious Ivashkov family. His apartment was nothing like that, instead it was… almost homey and comfortable looking.

I could hear the sound of the shower start up as I wandered around taking in my surroundings, and a moment later I heard something that made me laugh out loud. Adrian was singing, slightly off key. My amusement was short lived, however, as my aimless pacing took me closer to the bedroom and my tired brain processed exactly what the lyrics were.

"She's a mystery…  
My most beautiful regret…  
I will never understand her,  
She's a mystery…  
The only promise I can keep…  
Even in my dreams she ruins me.

She's anything in the world…  
That you cannot explain…  
But when she throws me a smile,  
It's fire in the rain."

A swift, sharp pain lanced through my chest. I wasn't _in love_ with Adrian—I never had been—but I _did_ love and care about him as a friend. It hurt to recognize the significance in his song choice. Likewise, it made me realize that while finding someone new might have healed his broken heart, it hadn't erased the pain I'd involuntarily inflicted on him. That ache would linger on, and unfortunately, it might never go away.

Behind me, a strange buzzing drew my attention away from his voice; I recognized the sound, it was a cell phone set to vibrate. Glancing around, I spotted it on the coffee table and with a quick glance over my shoulder towards the bedroom I crossed the room, scooping it up and staring down at the illuminated display which indicated one unread text. I knew I shouldn't snoop, and I wish I could say that was enough to stop me, but it wasn't. After a brief argument with my conscious—during which I reminded myself that Adrian had already pointed out that I'd betrayed his trust before—I gave into temptation. The fact that it might be his human girlfriend made it completely impossible to resist; I could potentially be holding the answer to all my questions right in the palm of my hand. I unlocked the phone and began trying to figure out how to access the message.

My spirits fell when I saw who the sender was. I'd been expecting to solve the mystery that was clawing away at my brain, but instead it was only a message from Sydney. Glancing at the message, I was just about to turn the phone off and return it to the table when I comprehended exactly what it was I was looking at.  
'_Rose suspects—she knows you're seeing a human and she's trying to find out a name. Call me.'_

Knowing how the Alchemist felt about Moroi, the very fact she was willing to help Adrian conceal his girlfriend from me was amazing. Sure I was irritated that she was trying to hide things from me, but I was impressed with her dedication to the assignment in Palm Springs. Hearing the water shut off, I replaced the phone and sank down on the couch, tipping my head back and closing my eyes in an attempt to cover my snooping. It worked; when Adrian entered the room a few minutes later, it was obvious he thought I'd fallen asleep.

He practically tiptoed to my side, calling my name in a hushed, quite voice, and if it wouldn't have given me away, I might have smiled at his hesitance to wake me. Everyone knew I hated being disturbed when napping—something he apparently remembered.

"Rose…. Wake up…"

Slitting my eyes open in what I hoped was a convincing manner, I scowled as I peered up at him. "Has anyone ever told you that you can't carry a tune?"

His cautious expression disappeared, replaced by one of mirth as he laughed at my statement. It was a sound I'd missed over the last few months. Adrian's laughter was infectious; it made my attempt to appear angry vanish in thin air. A broad smile broke out across my face as I looked up at him, pleased to know that no matter what had happened between us, I could still amuse him.

"So did you actually manage to put any paint on a canvas? Because from the way you looked when I came in, I'm guessing the answer is no."

"Ah, there's that Rose Hathaway sarcasm I know and love." He almost winced as soon as the words left his mouth, and it was impossible to ignore the way they hung, tense and heavy in the air between us. I knew he had meant it in a joking manner, but it hit entirely too close to home, making us both uncomfortable.

Searching my mind for something—anything—to end the tense silence that seemed to be pressing down on us like a weight, I spouted out the first thing I latched onto that wouldn't start a fight. "So… are you gonna show me your latest masterpiece?"

"No."

"No?" I shot him a curious look. "Why not?"

"It's… not finished." Adrian patted his pockets—a gesture I recognized all too well—and I couldn't contain a sigh as I struggled to bite back a comment on the dangers of smoking. "I need one, okay?"

"I didn't say a word!"

"You didn't have to—you gave me 'the look'. He produced his pack and pulled out one of the black clove cigarettes, resuming the search—presumably for his lighter.

"What look?" I honestly had no idea what he meant.

"The 'I'm not going to harass you about your disgusting habit, but it's killing me to hold it in' look." He smirked at me, gesturing towards the door. "I'll go outside so your lungs don't get polluted."

I was surprised that he'd go out of his way just to satisfy me. "Thanks Adrian. I really appreciate it, but it's your apartment—"

"No worries—I'm trying not to smoke inside." He paused at the door and looked back at me with an almost shy expression on his face. That threw me almost as much as his offer to smoke outside—Adrian was many things—cocky, egocentrically, and at times just plain overbearing—but he was never unsure of himself. He looked almost… nervous as he played with his cigarette. "If you're interested in my work, I have some finished paintings in the closet."

He didn't wait for me to respond—he just walked out the door as if it didn't matter to him whether I took him up on the offer or not. If he'd stuck around for a few more seconds he'd have seen me making a beeline for the closet. There was no way I was going to pass up the chance to see Adrian's paintings. I'd seen his sketches before, but those had been quickly drawn on napkins or loose leaf paper, taking only a few minutes to complete. These would be the real deal, each one representing hours if not days of painstaking work, the finished product giving a rare hidden glimpse into the inner workings of his mind.

I expected to find three or four canvases—but in actuality there were over two dozen, carefully stacked and draped with a thin cotton blanket covering them. Crouching down, I pulled them out one at a time, studying them carefully. I'm no art critic, but the fact he had talent was obvious—almost as obvious as the change in the paintings themselves as I progressed through the stack. Each one was labeled with a title and the date of its completion on the back, but I didn't need to see the dates to know when they'd been created. The earliest ones were dark and depressing; most were black and red with an occasional hint of charcoal, the strokes jagged and harsh. Looking at them was almost painful; it was like the artist had taken his emotions and mixed his agony in with the paint, coating the canvas with his torment in a futile attempt to exorcize it from his mind. The fact the red often bore an abstract resemblance to a rose wasn't lost on me. It only confirmed what I already suspected—these paintings represented Adrian's feelings immediately after his arrival in Palm Springs. When I came to one piece—a beautifully rendered brown eye with long, dark lashes, I almost dropped the painting. It was so perfectly rendered it was hard to believe he had painted it from memory. It was my eye—and somehow he'd even managed to convey the emotions I thought I'd kept hidden from him. Staring at it I could sense the grief and loss I'd carried for such a long, long time; it made me wonder if he'd always suspected that even when we were together I was longing for someone else—Dimitri.

Gradually, the paintings changed. The colors switched from drab and dismal to ones I associated with lighter feelings, like happiness and hope. Their shades alternated between calming, peaceful blues and bright, almost metallic golds, interwoven with an occasional daub of claret to accent the designs. And the strokes themselves were different too, swirling and graceful, as if he were no longer driven by pain, but instead was fueled by something that inspired him. The newest pieces were soothing and filled me with the strangest feeling of… well, peace, for lack of a better word, as strange as that may sound. I stared at the final canvas, reaching out to trace my finger along the edges of the flowers it held; each was beautifully formed, so perfect it was like staring at a photograph. One half was dark, the other light—in the foreground a dark red rose sat beside a beautiful gilded lily, their stems intertwined. Out of all the paintings I'd seen, this one was the one that touched me the most. I could almost sense that with this particular piece, the journey I'd witnessed from the depths of despair towards a new, fresh start had been complete. And the fact that the lily was identical to the one on a certain Alchemist's cheek made me realize that Sydney Sage was much, much more to Adrian than just a liaison to the court, and she was a hell of a lot more than just a friend.

"I finished that one about a week ago."

I jumped at the sound of his voice, so wrapped up in the beautiful imagery that I'd been unaware of his return. "Jesus Adrian. Put a fucking bell on or something."

He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Do you like it?"

"It's beautiful," I answered truthfully, guiltily jerking my hand back from where I'd been stroking the paint. "I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't be touching it."

"You can do whatever you want with it—I painted it for you."

I glanced up at him, stunned. "What? Adrian—"

"Turn it over." His voice was soft, filled with a sort of sense of loss that I recognized. I felt it all the time, whenever I thought about how badly things had ended between us.

Carefully I flipped the painting over and peered at the label, trying to decipher his artistically messy handwriting. It was titled 'Discovering Loves Truth' and underneath it, in large block letters, he had printed out 'for Rose'. "Why would you make this for me?"

"Because you told me that you weren't the one for me. That you didn't balance me like I needed. You said that when I found that person, I would know it. And you said I was strong. You were right—about all of it." He walked over and took the canvas out of my hands, examining it with a critical eye for a moment before continuing. "I hate the way things happened, but I'm strong enough now to admit that some of the things you said that day were pretty damned accurate."

I bit my lip, unsure how to respond. "And some of them were harsh, and shouldn't have been said," I offered.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He kept his gaze on the painting, not looking in my direction.

"What?"

"Why weren't you just honest with me? It's not like I was unavailable—I kept visiting you in your dreams. You could have said something." He sounded completely calm, not betraying a hint of emotion.

"Adrian… I wanted to talk to you in person. To explain—"

"When did it start?" His jaw tensed as he cut me off. I watched him set the painting down and move over to the first one I'd pulled out—one that was black with angry looking slashes of red running down the middle, making me think of jagged claw marks.

"Does it really matter?" I kept my voice even, speaking softly, not wanting the conversation to dissolve into a fight.

He spun around, his expression almost tormented. "_It matters to me," _he said, his voice rising, "How long was it before you fell back in his arms? A day? Two?" He closed his eyes for a minute, struggling—I supposed—to control his anger. "I sent the woman I loved off with her ex—a man she claimed she was over—in an effort to save her life. I think I deserve the truth."

My temper flared—as always—at the worst possible time. "You _knew_ I had feelings for him! Hell, you probably knew he still loved me too! You could see it in our fucking auras from day one!"

He gave a bitter, mirthless laugh, running his hands through his already tousled hair. "It's not exactly like they give out handbooks Rose—it's a learn as you go process. Sure I noticed there was a difference when the two of you were together—but I didn't _know _what it meant. Not then." He stared at me, unblinking, his green eyes intent. "You still haven't answered me. When did the cheating start?"

My anger drained away and I shifted my gaze, unable to look directly at him. He was right—he deserved the truth—but acknowledging that fact didn't make answering him any easier. "The night before we came back."

He looked at me skeptically for a minute, like he didn't believe me, but then his expression shifted as he remembered our encounter that night, and he closed his eyes as realization hit home. "Guess now I know why your aura was so bright—you must have just… Jesus. Talk about bad timing."

"If you want the honest truth Adrian—the complete truth—that's not when it started. That's just when…" I trailed off, not wanting to voice my thoughts. "It was always there. I always loved him."

"You don't pull any punches, do you? You just can't resist rubbing salt in my wounds."

"I should have told you everything. Not that night—but as soon as I came back from Russia. But I couldn't face it then. I thought I had killed the only man I would ever love—my other half—and I needed your friendship. You never seemed to understand how I felt after the attack. It was… it was as if my soul had died in that cave right along with him. I was still walking around, talking and breathing… but I wasn't alive. I was just going through the motions. Even so, I tried to do the right thing—to keep the promises I made, to you and to him. I tried to move on… but I couldn't. He's always been the one Adrian. Even when he was a Strigoi…"

"You were… different when you came back. You were broken. I thought it was because of the things I saw when I visited your dreams… all those bites—"

"He couldn't help it!" My fists clenched at my sides as I struggled to control the urge to strike out at him, furious that he'd bring something like that into the discussion. "It wasn't him—he protected me… defended me against the others."

"Of course. Even as a Strigoi you would consider him a saint." He sneered at me, any headway we had made while discussing his painting shattering into a million tiny pieces around us.

"Grow the fuck up Adrian," I snapped, shaking my head. "It wasn't his fault. When he was turned… everything good and decent about him was erased. Maybe it's easier for me to accept because I know firsthand what it's like to be taken over by something dark… something that makes you violent and…" A strange comparison entered my head, one I'd never considered before. Whatever I was about to say was lost as my mind reeled, and for a moment my knees actually went weak and I swear I saw spots. It was like the thoughts coursing through my head had sent me into shock.

"Rose? What's wrong?" Adrian's concerned voice reached through the waves of gray, and I shook my head, struggling to compose myself.

"Nothing… I just… hang on a minute." He watched as I struggled to piece together the half formed images in my mind, his fingers twitching as if he were fighting an internal battle of his own, trying not to reach for the cigarette he needed. "Go ahead and smoke, it won't kill me."

"No, but whatever you're thinking might—I swear to God you went white as a sheet." He lit up and I relaxed slightly at the sweet, cloying scent of the cloves drifted over to me. As much as I hated the smell, it was something familiar that I could cling to as I contemplated the horrific theory forming in my head. "Oh God. I know that expression. Whatever you're thinking can't be good. "

I shot him a dark look. "You have no idea what I'm thinking."

"No, I don't, but I do _know_ you, Rose. Whenever you concentrate this hard, chaos ensues."

I shook my head, irritated. "I just thought of something… something that makes sense in a weird, terrifying, out there kind of way." I sighed, wanting to test my theory out on him, knowing it would be easier to discuss it with him than with Dimitri. Bouncing this idea off the man I loved would be unbelievably hard, because his time as a Strigoi was a subject we avoided. It brought back too many bad memories about things that still haunted him. He had forgiven himself, but still, sometimes when I looked into his eyes, I could see the deep seated sorrow he would probably carry with him forever.

"No one really knows where Strigoi originated, right? I mean, we know that dark magic reanimates them, but that's it." I spoke slowly, trying to make sense out of my frenzied, chaotic thoughts. "When the dark side of spirit took over, it wiped out all rational thought. All I could think about was violence… Adrian—what if spirit's darkness is what animates them?"

I glanced over at him, wondering if he understood what I was saying. If the stunned look on his face was anything to go by—I'd venture a guess that he grasped the concept. "Rose…"

"Just listen! Moroi hold traces of all the elements magic—now we know that includes spirit too. What if when a Moroi drains someone… what if it gives spirit… a boost or something—but not the positive aspect of it, but the dark side, because of the… evilness—for lack of a better word—of the act? What if _that's_ the dark magic that awakens them?"

Adrian was staring at me like I'd suddenly grown a second head. I hurried on, wanting to get it all out before he shot down the theory. "When the Strigoi uses blood to awaken someone—maybe some of the darkness siphons off into the new host—sort of like how it jumped from Lissa's aura to mine when we were bonded. It would explain everything—maybe a restored Strigoi can't be reawakened because the influx of the positive, healing side of spirit acts like… like an inoculation or something, making them immune. Like chickenpox, you know? I'm willing to bet it also slows down the madness from affecting Sonya—she's a hell of a lot more stable now than she used to be, and she's using spirit all the time."

Adrian shook his head, looking dazed. "Rose—"

"I know it sounds insane, but it could be true!" I paced, my mind still going a million miles a minute, amazed that the answer could have been staring us in the face all along.

"Rose—"

"It's just a theory… maybe we could—"

"Rose!" He grabbed my arm, and the fact he was voluntarily touching me shocked me into silence. "It's absolutely brilliant."

My lips tugged up in a small grin at the blatant admiration in his voice—it was something I never thought I would hear again. "You really think so?"

He smiled at me, and it wasn't the fake smile he'd given me since our breakup—it was a genuine, one hundred percent Adrian Ivashkov grin. "I do. People tend to forget that there's a sharp mind behind that beautiful face. I know I did, and I'm sorry for that."

I blushed a little, pleased by the compliment. It meant a lot to me—especially coming from him. "I need to make some calls. Sonya and Dimi—" I caught myself, afraid that mentioning my boyfriends name would destroy the momentary truce between us.

"You can say his name Rose. I won't flip out." Adrian released my arm, his smile wilting a little. "I was forced to work with him, remember?"

"I didn't want to make things uncomfortable between us again. It feels good, talking to you again." And it did. It made me remember all the fun times we'd had together—not as a couple, but back before our doomed relationship had entered into the equation, skewering the dynamic of our friendship. They were good memories, but bittersweet at the same time, because they made me think about something I'd honestly never considered before.

Adrian had always put _me_ first—his own needs and desires taking a backseat to whatever it was I wanted. Even today he had done it, leaving his own apartment earlier to smoke because he knew how much I hated it. From the moment we'd met he had done anything and everything he possibly could to help me when I needed it. Whether it was something small—like cheering me up—or tackling something that seemed insurmountable—say, getting us to Victors trial, or funding my trip to Russia—he had _always_ come through for me. He'd even risked his own sanity by giving up booze and cutting back on smoking in an attempt to please me.

And how had I repaid him? With lies and deception, hurting him more than I'd ever imagined was possible. I felt my eyes flood with hot, shame filled tears, but I refused to let them fall. If they did, he would do the gentlemanly thing and try to comfort me—and that was the last thing on earth I deserved.

I bit my lip and took a deep breath, then looked him in the eye. "Adrian—I am so, so sorry for what happened. I know it's not enough, and I know there's nothing I can do or say to erase the pain I caused, but I really, truly mean it. Not a day goes by that I don't think of you and regret the way I handled things."

He stood there, silent, just staring at me for the longest time. Finally I sighed, turning to head for the door. I had to get out of there before I completely broke down. I could call Sonya and Dimitri from the car—after I let go of the flood of tears that were welling up inside me.

"Rose… wait!"

I paused, my hand on the doorknob, my damned renegade tears breaking free and trailing down my cheeks. Resting my head against the wood, I listened as he approached, then steeled myself to turn and face him. "What?"

I expected to see anger at my tears, or maybe even bitter amusement at my being upset. What I didn't expect was the look of compassion on his face. "I understand why you did it. You can't fight love—not the kind that you and Belikov have. Now that I've felt it for myself…" His voice trailed off and he shook his head. "It still hurts that you did it, but I get it now. And I forgive you."

A small sob escaped me, and before I even realized what was happening we were both in motion, closing the brief distance between us—for once moving towards each other instead of away. As his arms encircled me and I hugged him back, the most amazing sense of peace descended on me. This… this was what I had been waiting for. Having Adrian's forgiveness made my life finally feel complete.

"I've really missed you," I whispered.

He chuckled a little, releasing me and reaching down to gently wipe away my tears. "I've missed you too, Little dhampir."

At the sound of that ridiculous nickname my tears started again, even as I laughed. "God—I even missed hearing that."

"Of course you did. Everyone knows I come up with the best nicknames."

I groaned, swiping at my eyes. "Sure you do. Keep telling yourself that."

He gave me a look that was pure Adrian—a mix of charm and arrogance that no one else on earth could have pulled off. "I do. It's a fact. Like Agent Boring Borscht. You have to admit, that's pretty creative—and catchy."

"Oh my God. Seriously? You did _not _call him that." I couldn't help but giggle, imagining the expression on Dimitri's face at the name.

He grinned, leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms over his chest. "Not to his face, I didn't. I may be crazy, but I'm not suicidal." He studied me for a minute, the his smile widened. "So, you got time to let a devastatingly handsome ex take you out to dinner? Of course, you're buying. This crazy dhampir I was dating drained my trust fund searching the globe for her Russian Warlord, so now, I'm a starving artist."

I glanced at my watch, feeling a pang of genuine regret. "I'd love to Adrian, but I can't—I probably need to leave now or else I might miss my flight."

"I thought you needed to talk to me about something?" He looked at me, his confusion written across his face.

I smiled at him and shook my head. "Nothing important—it can wait."

"Nope—now you've got my curiosity peaked. What was it about?" He moved in front of the door, trapping me inside.

Looking up at him, thinking about the things he'd said, there was no way in hell I could have the conversation I'd mapped out in my head. So I said the only thing I could—and honestly, it was the only thing that mattered in the end, anyway. "That girl you've been seeing… I'm happy for you. But you tell her that if she hurts you, she better run, cause if that happens… she's gonna have me to contend with."

To say he looked completely floored would have been an understatement. He opened and closed his mouth, but no sound came out. When he was finally able to talk, he sounded almost hesitant. "You know about her? I mean, I know I said I had found someone… but do you know that she's—"

"Human? Yes. And I suspect I know who she is, too. But I don't want you to feel pressured to tell me anything until you feel ready. I don't care who she is, or what she is. As long as you're happy, that's all that matters."

"Jesus Rose. You've really changed." He shook his head, smiling a little. "I never thought I'd say this, but you and Belikov… you're good for each other."

"He knew about you and… her… and he never told me. When I mentioned it to him this afternoon he said he kept it a secret because he understood what you were feeling."

His handsome face crinkled up in a grimace. "Damn it—why'd you have to tell me that? Now I'm going to have to be nice to him."

"Adrian—when he was first restored… when he tried to convince me that he didn't love me anymore…" I had to stop for a minute to control my emotions—even now, knowing it had been a lie, it still hurt remembering his words. "He told me you were a good man. He respects you. Maybe now that I'm not in the way… someday the two of you could be friends. Stranger things have happened."

"Maybe." He looked thoughtful as he walked over and picked up the painting he'd made me, bringing it over and handing it to me with a smile. "I certainly don't _hate _him. Not anymore."

"That's good. Now I really do have to go."

He moved to the side opening the door for me, then grabbed my arm as I walked past, pulling me into another quick hug. "What made you change your mind? About Moroi and humans being… involved?"

"Nothing. I still feel the same way I always have about them. But like I said before, your happiness is more important to me than anything else. You've changed too, you know. You're happier and more stable than I've ever seen you." Pulling away I smiled at him, sad to leave. "I wish we had more time to talk. Maybe I can come back in a few weeks. I'd like to be formerly introduced to her… meet her as your girlfriend and not… you know."

"So you can put the fear of Rose Hathaway in her?" He teased.

"No, so I can thank her for helping you heal. And for helping me get one of my best friends back."

He nodded, his eyes holding a look that I couldn't quite place. They were deep and mysterious—and full of secrets I'd probably never figure out. "Take care little dhampir. Tell your Russian I said he better take care of you."

I was almost to my car when I heard him shout my name. Glancing over my shoulder I saw him standing at the building's entrance with a sly looking grin on his face. Not wanting to retrace my steps, I turned to face him, walking backwards towards my car. "What?"

"I was just thinking—a few weeks is way too long to wait for us to catch up on everything."

I stopped, confused. "I won't be able to get away before then, Adrian. Lissa needs me to—"

"Relax Rose, I just meant that you'd be seeing me a lot sooner than that."

I stared at him, not believing my ears. I was afraid to hope that he meant what I thought, knowing the disappointment would crush me if I were mistaken. "You mean…"

"Of course I do. But you better not complain about whatever it is I dress you in. Now get going. I'll see you later tonight."

I couldn't stop smiling as I climbed into the car, carefully sliding the beautiful painting behind the drivers seat. The fact that Adrian was willing to enter my dreams again was just further proof of how far we'd come today. Not only had I made what might be an amazing breakthrough concerning Strigoi, but against all odds, I'd managed to earn Adrian's forgiveness. We were on the road to mending our relationship, and while I knew there would be pitfalls and setbacks along the way—like when he realized I'd snooped through his text messages—but that was to be expected. We still had things to resolve and deal with, but for the first time, I actually had faith that we would succeed. It would be a difficult journey getting back to the friendship we'd had before; one with tears and hurt feelings, and probably a screaming match or two, but it would be worth it. The things that matter in life are the ones you have to work for—and I knew that better than anyone.


	7. Little Girl Lost

_**Requested by: Eli (princessjilldragomir on tumblr)**_

_**Prompt: **__Leave a "Get Me" in my ask, and I will write a drabble about my character saving yours._

_**Word Count:2,450**_

_**Hope you enjoy it.**_

* * *

I didn't hear the phone when it rang; I was asleep, and it takes a hell of a lot more than a faint chiming to wake me. In fact, it took Dimitri a few minutes before I even responded to his gentle shaking of my shoulder. Even then I didn't comprehend what he was saying. It wasn't until he held the phone up to my ear and I head the panicked sobs coming from the other end that I understood something was seriously wrong. Taking the phone from him I got up and immediately began pulling on the clothes I'd discarded a few hours earlier.

"Liss? Is that you?" I couldn't make out the tearful response so I glanced at the display on the phone, my eyes widening in surprise when I saw the number. "Jill? What's wrong?"

Again, the response was a mixture of mumbled words and sobs that I couldn't decipher. I glanced over at Dimitri, not surprised to see him already dressed and pulling on his boots, his handsome face reflecting his worry. "JILL! You have to calm down—I can't understand you. Are you okay?"

The sharpness of my tone seemed to help her regain a little control; this time when she spoke, I could faintly make out part of what she whispered—and it immediately sent chills racing down my spine.

"H-help me…. Darkness…"

"Tell me where you are Jilly—I'm on my way." I knew she was in the general vicinity—she'd flown in the day before for a visit with Lissa, but court was a big place, covering acres and acres of sprawling ground. She could be anywhere, so I needed to pinpoint her location. Opening up the top drawer of our dresser, I pulled out the small silk pouch that held the spirit charmed rings I kept on hand for Lissa. "Are you in your room?"

"Yes..." Her voice was thin and frail, and something about the way it sounded scared me even more.

"I'm coming, just hang on for a few more minutes. I'm gonna stay on the line until—Jill? Are you there?"

The connection had gone dead.

"Fuck!" Turning to Dimitri, I spoke without consciously thinking, knowing instinctively what had to be done. "Get Lissa and meet me at Jill's room. The darkness has got her."

"Roza—"

"No! Just get Liss! We'll need her there in case…" I trailed off, not wanting to voice what I was thinking. "Just hurry, Comrade, please." Standing on tiptoe I brushed my lips against his and then was out the door and running for Jill's suite at full speed, not waiting for a response. With each slap of my feet on the ground I prayed to anyone who might be listening, begging them to make sure I got there in time.

The darkness affected everyone differently; it had made me homicidal whereas with Lissa it had awoken the tendency to harm herself for relief. But it wasn't Lissa's reaction or mine that made me race through the corridors as fast as I could go. It was because something in Jill's voice—so desolate sounding and full of despair—made me think of Shadow Kissed Anna and how the heavy burden of the darkness had made her take her own life.

I arrived within minutes of the call, panting a little as I pounded furiously on the door, calling out for her. Ten seconds later when no answer came, I backed up to the far wall and launched myself, throwing the full weight of my body against the heavy wooden double doors. It took three tries before they finally gave, crashing inward and slamming into the walls with a loud bang that resonated down the quiet hallway. It was pitch black inside, but I could hear her sobbing broken heartedly from somewhere in the depths of the room.

"Jill?" I advanced slowly, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the absence of light, feeling my way along until my hands came in contact with a small table lamp. Flicking it on, I took advantage of the dim light it provided to survey the room, trying to locate her. "Jill? I know you're here."

As soon as I spoke the sobbing stopped, sounding like it had been forcefully choked off mid-cry. It was replaced a moment later by a low growl that made the tiny hairs at the back of my neck prickle with unease. "Jilly… Sweetie… Let me help you. I know what you're—"

A figure slammed into me, and in that moment, I realized why she hadn't answered—she was too busy planning her attack. She'd appeared from the darkness in an instant, catching me completely by surprise and slamming me to the ground, her long, slender hands clasped around my neck, slowly choking me.

"Slut," she hissed out, "this is all your fault!"

It took a minute for the shock of her attack to wear off, and unfortunately, that was a minute too long. The force I'd hit the ground with combined with the press of her weight on my chest had knocked the air from my lungs, and I was gasping, struggling to get a breath. I knew I was well on my way to blacking out and if that happened, she would end up killing me—and that was something that Jill would never be able to get past.

There was only one course of action I could take, so I latched onto it, hauling off and punching the Queen's sister with all the force I could muster from my prone position. I'm pleased to say, it was a good, solid blow, throwing her off me and earning a pain filled scream. Sucking in air I rolled over, tackling her and wrestling her down, trying to hold her in place with the weight of my body.

"Get the hell off me you blood whore!" She was shrieking and thrashing around, trying to throw me off of her.

"Not until you calm the fuck down." I was hesitant to hit her again, knowing far too well the kind of damage I was capable of inflicting. Yes, she was out of control and fueled by spirit's darkness, but I was a promised guardian with years of training.

My hesitancy cost me—just like it had the last time I was confronted with hurting someone I cared about. Jill jerked her wrist free of my grasp, clawing at my face, making me instantly tuck my head to my chest in an attempt to protect my eyes—and in that moment, she made her move. Her hand dropped, jerking the gun that I always wore out of its holster and pressing it to my temple.

"I said get the hell off me, Hathaway."

Biting down on my lip, I struggled to make my limbs obey her command. Every part of me was tense, focused on the hard press of the muzzle against my skin. If her finger slipped… well, let's just say there's be no coming back for me this time around. I slowly released her, backing up until she could move freely. "Jill, please...listen to me—"

"No, for once _you're _going to listen! I wouldn't _be _like this if it wasn't for you!"

"I'm not the one that stabbed you," I said softly, my eyes never straying from hers as my mind raced. I was full of regret for not listening to whatever it was Dimitri had been trying to tell me. Not because I thought it might have helped me with Jill, but simply because I realized it might very well be the last time I ever spoke to him. If I died—here… tonight—it would be without having the chance to tell him how much I loved him.

"No but you're the one who almost drove Adrian off the deep end! Where do you think all that depression and anger went Rose? _ Into ME_. For months I soaked it up like a sponge, without even realizing it. And it's still coming, even though he's happy! Whenever he remembers what you did it hits me all over again."

She pressed the gun more firmly against my head, adjusting her grip and I fought not to wince. "Killing me won't take the darkness away, Jill. It will only make things worse for you."

She studied my face for a moment, and in the silence I could almost swear I heard my heart racing. "You're right. I'll still be getting it, only it will probably be worse. He'll blame himself for this." In the blink of an eye she moved, transferring the gun to her own temple. "But if I kill myself it all goes away. And he won't have anything to feel guilty about."

"Do you honestly think he wouldn't feel guilty over your suicide? Hell—if anything would push him over the brink it would be that!" I was preparing myself to move towards her but she was a lot more observant than I realized, catching the tensing of my muscles and shaking her head. "Don't come any closer, Rose—I mean it."

"If you do this… you'll be killing Adrian too. Is that what you want?" I tried to keep my tone soothing, and it was hard. I knew at any moment Dimitri and Lissa would come walking through the door, and in her current frame of mind, Jill might shoot—either herself or one of them—without meaning to.

"It won't matter. He won't care. No one does."

"That's bullshit and you fucking know it!" My temper reared its head and I took a step forward without meaning to, making her retreat a few steps more to maintain the distance between us. "He risked his own sanity to bring you back from the dead."

"So Lissa could keep her crown! That's all any of you care about!" She hurled the accusations at me, her voice laced with a deep seated pain that made me realize she actually believed every word she'd said.

"No. We _all_ care about _you._ Lissa. Adrian. Eddie." I reeled off the names, hoping she would see the truth in what I was saying and realize exactly how many people her actions would effect. "Sydney and Christian. Dimitri and me. We _care._"

"The only people you care about are Dimitri and Lissa. To you I'm just the spare Dragomir." Her voice waivered, making me long to pull her into my arms and whisper promises of how things would be different tomorrow. I swore to myself that if we got through this, things were going to change. No one should feel the way she was feeling, and I'd damn sure make sure she never felt that way again.

"You're absolutely right. I don't give a shit about the spare Dragomir. I care about Jill Mastrano—the girl I met at Saint Vlad's who was full of enthusiasm and questions. That girl had a chance to walk away from all the bullshit associated with being a Royal. She had a chance at a normal life, but gave it up for the good of others. That girl is worth more to me than a thousand fucking Royals, because she made a noble decision that had nothing to do with the Dragomir blood in her veins. She made it because it was _the right thing to do. _That kind of nobility isn't something that comes from your ancestors—it comes from how you're raised. So there's two more people to add to the list. Your mom and step dad. Just like me—and Christian and Adrian—they love you for who you are _inside_. Not the princess—but the girl. Remember… Christian and Adrian were your friends long before they knew anything about who your father was."

She stared at me, wide eyed, her bottom lip quivering. "You don't know what it's like… it's always there… always in my head, Rose."

"Oh God Jill—I _do _know. It's like.. a thick sticky film of oil, sliding over you and seeping into your pores, pressing down on you, getting heavier every day. It makes it hard to think straight… it's even hard to breathe at times. And I'll tell you something else.. something no one knows. I still feel it at times, rolling around in my head. It's almost as if when the bond dissolved, some of it got trapped inside me. It's always there, just like yours is Jill. And it's never, ever gonna go away."

She closed her eyes for a minute, her jaw tensing. "If I hadn't admitted who I was, none of this would have happened. I never would have died… I'd still be free to do whatever I wanted. My life's not my own anymore, so what's the point in living?"

I sighed, shaking my head. "I understand that, believe me, I do. I've lived with it my whole life—all dhampirs do. We live for the Moroi. But Jill—I stood up for what I wanted. You can too—I'll help you. I promise."

We stood staring at each other for the space of a hundred heartbeats, then she dropped the gun and hurled herself across the distance, wrapping her arms around my neck and burying her face in my neck. "I'm sorry. Oh God… I'm so sorry."

I stroked her hair with one hand, quietly whispering soothing words as I dug in my pocket and pulled out one of the heavy silver rings. "Jilly, you have to swear to me you'll always wear a piece of charmed silver. If you promise me, I won't tell anyone what happened here. It will be our secret." I slid the ring on her finger as she nodded, then hugged her close as she cried, trying to ignore the tears that trailed down my cheeks as well. I cried for the life she'd lost, and the smiling girl I'd met back at school. I cried for the loss of her happy, carefree teenage years, and yes, I'll admit it, I cried for the loss of mine too. I'd never had the life I wanted back then, but I would make sure she didn't miss out on experiencing everything I'd missed.

Glancing up, I saw Dimitri leaning against the door frame, watching me with an expression full of love and pride. At his side stood Lissa, and she wore that expression too, only it wasn't me she was looking at—it was the girl in my arms. And right then, I knew that somehow, everything would be alright. As long as we all had each other—and loved each other—nothing could stand in our way.


End file.
